Parents – Are you really aware?

I was speaking with a parent who was at their wits end with their child who was showing zero respect and basically running the show. The home atmosphere was being completely comprised by this child in their late teens, as were any rules. We looked at boundary setting, exploring the possibility of establishing small easily maintained boundaries to begin the process of taking charge again. I was unsure of the parent’s capacity to set and hold a boundary so we were exploring some very basic and simple ideas.

Suddenly the parent joked that this ‘boundary’ would only be maintained when it suited them to do so, as sometimes they liked their teen e.g. lost in TV. I was struck by the complete lack of awareness in this parent of the damage they were doing – i.e. by indulging and then blaming, the so familiar ‘all or nothing’. It reminds me that although we may see the problem in the difficult or obese child (as per article attached) we must not forget that sometimes the parent(s) directs their child towards these ways of passing the time to get them off their hands.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-18930131

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