Parenting for Prevention Workshops

I have been presenting Parenting for Prevention workshops in schools across the UK for around 10 years and am now planning to bring this material into the treatment environment as a workshop targeted towards helping parents whose children suffer from addiction.

Every parent with a child of any age who is acting out in an addictive way needs to be aware of their boundaries, be able to present a consistent response to any demand or behaviour, and to feel that their decision is seated in respect and self esteem.

I often get asked where the line is drawn between good parenting, ie the duty to love, guide, punish and teach, and unhealthy enmeshed parenting where there is often an over involvement and overt sense of responsibility and resentment. Although the age of the child is relevant in this discussion, the core principles are the same and a big question is who is in charge?

In a family where addiction is present it can often appear as if the addict is running the show, able to hijack any interaction or event and frequently create worry and drama. But of course it is not the addict per se, it is addiction itself that is operating within the family system. Once parents and family members start to behave in a coordinated and healthy way, changes always happen.

This workshop is specifically designed to illustrate adolescent reactions that can feed conflict and splitting which are instantly recognizable. There is usually a lot of laughter in this workshop before parents get down to working on understanding and then practicing the simple responses that can make all the difference.

These patterns always exist in addictive relationships and it is vital that those close to the addict know how to navigate them, to feel confident that they are supporting the solution not feeding the problem.

Please contact the office if you are interested in attending any of our workshops in the future: 020 7323 4970

Family Groups

Family Group is a very important part of Charter’s addiction treatment programme.  Currently costing just £150pa per family member for unlimited access, the groups provide an introduction to addiction and vital peer and counselling support for family members of an addict.

The familiar position of lose:lose is the domain of the families of addicts, where it is so hard to know what to do as your loved one perpetually holds the proverbial gun to their own head and, finger on trigger, reacts what you say and do.

At Charter we advocate re-establishing a sense of nourishment and self respect in the family member so that they too can make a decision instead of just reacting to a situation:- fire fighting. This takes time and commitment and I am proud to say that we have a core group of hard working family members cementing the changes with their increasing understanding and personal growth. When one person changes, the dance changes. So whether your addict is on board (yet) or not, working in the family group can make all the difference to the possibility and nature of recovery in your life.

We also hold family workshop weekends that provide a more intensive introduction to letting go with love, enablement vs tough love and how to take care of you – many family members recoil from such apparently new age statements (as did my own parents many years ago) – but these workshops have proven to be of fundamental use to those struggling to gain purchase on this slippery and destructive condition in the life of someone they love.

Addiction is all consuming, self centred, provocative and relentless. It takes experience to know how to behave around it, and courage and compassion not to feed it.  The group will support you while you learn…

Charter Residential at Primrose Hill

With a history of relapse and poor management I sometimes wonder at my wisdom of taking on Primrose Hill as we had such a climate of prejudice to overcome.

Fortunately, under the careful and attentive management of Clare Sole, we have been consistently busy there since opening in 2010. I believe we are now gaining ourselves a reputation by earning it as a boundaried, accountable safe housing service for those needing extra support in their recovery journeys.

We have 10 beds and admit males and females from 18-65 years at different stages of their recovery, as long as they are abstinent and actively engaged in a 12 step programme or in treatment. It’s a lovely mid terrace Victorian house, has a support worker in residence and provides a temporary home from home.

We provide drug and alcohol testing, weekly planning and support, cooking support, an introduction to fellowship, community living with therapeutic duties, curfews and peer responsibilities.

Alongside treatment, or as extra support through transitions geographically, work-wise or relationship-wise, Charter Residential provides an extraordinary service that is affordable, effective and grounding.

We work with you to get well in the context of your life.

More About Charter

Charter Day Care was launched in 2008 to provide intensive, effective and affordable addiction treatment in central London, where a person  can get well in the context of their lives. It has been hugely  successful in terms of client numbers as well as quality of recovery,  with a thriving aftercare service that is testament to this fact. Working from a psychodynamic approach and employing the 12 step  method alongside motivational interviewing, gestalt therapy, creative arts and body workshops, somatic experiencing (for trauma) and CBT techniques, Charter has a well rounded and successful treatment  programme.  In 2010 we opened Charter Residential, a 10 bed sober  living house in Primrose Hill with 24/7 on site residential support,  boundaries and community living. This is for people needing extra support either through treatment, some sort of transition ( e.g. geographical or relationship) or through a difficult period.

We treat most addictions including substance misuse, co dependence  and sex and love addiction, bulimia, over eating, work addiction and  crucially involve family members whenever appropriate. Many of our  clients are relapsers who haven’t been able to get well elsewhere, the costs are surprisingly affordable.  Our programme is flexible so  that minimum attendance is one full week after which we can agree a schedule of attendance according to assessment – containment is key  and we will never agree a care plan that we feel sets the client up to fail.

We mean business in terms of recovery and go the extra mile to ensure the quality of recovery gained is sustainable. This is a small and personal organisation where every team member, including admin, knows every client, and where the director and founder is hands on so that you are as likely to see her in group, in an intervention or making the team a cup of tea! We are FDAP accredited and approved with several different insurance companies.

Once you are part of the Charter family, the door is always open.

More women addicted to prescription medications than illegal drugs

I agree this is a fast growing health problem.  I bear witness to people whose dependence on these drugs causes more trouble than the original issue.  Medication is rarely a cure, but if managed properly it can provide a valuable support whilst the individual explore more sustainable ways of coping with stress, anxiety and expectations of themselves in this highly pressurised society.  Therapy is an extraordinary tool to achieve just this and transforming many people’s lives.

Try it – it works!!

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/903380-more-women-addicted-to-prescription-tranquillisers-than-illegal-drugs